Opposite Sex Day: Craziness Ensues
by Minako Mikoto
Summary: Sequel to Opposite Sex Day. The craziness is back and this time Harry and Draco learn a little more about Professor McGonnagall then they had originally hoped. Who knew she was so kinky? Also DMxHP and Hermione acting gangsta. Rated to be safe


Opposite Sex Day: Craziness Ensues

MM: Alrighty...so I just reread my original Opposite Sex Day and I figured...So many holes in the plot...why not write a sequel and clear those up a bit? Ok so i have no real plot for this one...Ehm we'll just have to see where it goes...O.o

NOTE: Yes I know, the title is very un-original, but...oh well. Oh and just so you know you will definitely need to read Opposite Sex Day first. Hmm also I want to note that, honestly if I owned Harry Potter, you would not be able to recognize the books...or the movie...well maybe...it would be helluva lot different.

Warnings: Ultra-Lite Crack, Ooc-ness, DMxHP, PWP, Insanity on my part, and does not follow HBP or DH... oh and mentions of Sub!Harry...

OPPOSITE SEX DAY: CRAZINESS ENSUES

Harry was not in his right mind. There was just no way. The whole Snape incident just the day before was crazy enough, but this was just impossible. He was shocked students actually thought the loony old codger was serious. Well, truthfully, Dumbledore probably was serious. It must have been that stuff McGonnagall put in his drink. Harry's rambling was put to rest

"Mmmm morning Scarface," said a very sexy looking Draco Malfoy in a teasing tone. He walked up next to Harry and put his arm arround the Golden-boy's waist. His voice no longer held the malice it would have a few years ago.

"Morning Draco. Can you believe that old coot? He actually went through with his ludicris idea! Just a moment ago Terry Boot just walked by wearing a satin gown fit for the Oscars(1)! And I saw Filch wearing a Jade colored mini-skirt, which mind you, scarred me for life." Harry waved his hands around about his head haphazardously. Draco just merely raised an eyebrow, before wrapping his arms completely around Harry's waist.

"It's just a holiday."

"How are you so calm? This is not right!" Harry glared at Draco, albeit softly.

"I am calm because I plan to have my mind obliviated of this event as soon as it is over." Harry looked at Draco skeptically.

"Really now? Well, we better get lunch over with."

"Oh dear Merlin." Draco's jaw dropped. In the very same room that Severus Snape decided to wear hooker clothing, students milled about in various outfits. Even Hermione had dressed up.

"Hermione?! You're actually participating?" Hermione just beamed at Harry. She was wearing very baggy blue jeans with graffiti on them and a baggy baseball jersey that said 'Gangsta' on the front.

"Harry dawg! Whaddup G?" Harry looked to Draco for a translation, however he got none. Draco merely shrugged his shoulders.

"Granger, that look is horrendous. You look like you just walked away from some angry muggle spray cans."

"Don't be Hatin'! I dig my threads yo!" (note: my gangster is horrible and I probably just shredded it to bits but...oh well) "Well I be splittin'. Catch ya lata!" Harry blinked.

"Maybe McGonnagall slipped her some of that stuff she gave to Dumbledore last week."

"Who knows." Harry and Draco walked, or tip toed into the Great Hall just a bit more. Just as they got not three steps, Dumbledore stood up again.

"AH, my children! Lovely holiday it is! I just wanted to announce that from now on every day shall be a new Holiday! And the specifics of the holiday shall be announced the day before! Tomorrow shall be Goth Day!! Thank you! Have a lovely day!" Harry merely stared at his outfit. Dumbledore had been wearing a gown that was red in color, went down to the knees, and and was strapless. Severus was wearing one of those school girl outfits you usually saw in dirty movies. That was just the beginnging. Much to the horror of the young couple, nearly every male student was wearing some form of skimpy clothing.

"I think I need to go back to bed and just sleep the rest of the day off." Harry started towards the door, but Draco pulled him back.

"Non-sense, we still need to figure out what it is that McGonnagall gave the old codger." Harry only sighed.

Harry huffed as the two sixth years searched McGonnagall's empty classroom for evidence. Draco was checking the desk, while Harry got the task of the supply closet.

"You've got to be joking me." Draco looked utterly disgusted as he held up a pair of thong panties with a quill.

"What? Oh nasty! Just what does she see the need for those for?" Harry wanted to throw up his lunch.

"I don't want to know." Draco quickly dropped them back into the drawer(sp?) he found them in. Harry meanwhile squeaked as he jumped back.

"She has a collection of dirty magazines in her supply closet!" Harry quickly shoved them to the side to see behind them.

"Ugh. Dice, rubber mice, a bag of water balloons? What are those?" Draco grabbed the bag and held it up to show Harry.

"They're muggle. You fill them up with water, tie the end of them and throw them at people. Usually in the summer." Draco just 'hmphd' and put them back, closing the drawer and opening another. In that drawer he found a strange book. The title read: How to Successfully Get the Most Out of Your Intimate Toys by Ron Jeremy.

"What the hell is this?" Harry blinked and walked over looking at the title, blushing.

"It's a book about muggle bedroom toys Draco." Draco formed an 'o' getting the idea. Harry walked back over to the closet and moved a box letting out a 'meep.' "Ugh! Why does she have this?" Harry blushed bright red. Draco walked over.

"Have what?" Harry merely pointed at the object in question. "What is it?"

"Its called a vibrator. It's used by usually women." Draco raised an eyebrow.

"What does it do exactly?" Harry blushed and whispered it in Draco's ear.

"Hmm. Maybe we shall get one of those." Draco merely smiled predatorily at Harry. Draco moved the book finding a baggy of white powder. "Ah! Found it!" Harry rushed over to take a look.

"It's a muggle drug called Cocaine. No wonder Dumbledore's been off lately. Anyway's let's go!" Harry grabbed Draco and dragged him out of the classroom.

"You know Harry, I saw a pair of handcuffs back there that we could use on you." Draco smiled swinging the handcuffs on his index finger. Even he knew the uses of handcuffs.

* * *

1. If you don't know the Oscars is an awards show that hands out little gold figurines to famous actors and actresses.

MM: Well that's that! Hope you had fun...anyways please give me loving! Review!


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